Nightfly Has Passed Away

Friends of Nightfly,

I am Michael's oldest brother. It is my sad duty to inform all of you that Michael passed away on April 6, 2007 in Ohio after several days in the hospital. His family and I were astonished to find so many people online who knew Michael. He was truly exceptional in so many ways, and it was my sad duty and privilege to give his eulogy. I do not know many of you, but I know that my brother cherished the friends he made here and in the real world.

I will be keeping his profiles open for some time. If Michael meant something to you, please post it as a comment, and I will share them with the rest of Michael's family. You may also send email to his Gmail account. For those that may wish to leave a memory, below is the link toMichael's obituary, where you may sign and view his condolence guest book: http://www.legacy.com/Dayton/Obituaries.asp?Page=LifeStory&PersonID=87153787

Offline a Bit...

I'm off to another state for a bit. People who know my new mobile phone number can reach me there. Ciao.

Texas...

This is why I moved again. Texas. Lovely...not.

The good news is that I've fully recovered (aesthetically) from the wound my ex-roommate gave me. I've got permanent eye damage from the blow, however, and I'll have to get that process going soon. I failed 1/3 of the eyesight tests for my driver's license renewal... I've got another eye appt. soon, so we'll have to see if surgery is required.

Vaya con dios.

Settling In

After quite a bit of travel and minutiae, I'm back online. I'd like to thank my friends and family for their emotional support and their counsel during this recent time; sometimes it's hard to step outside of our own skins and see the big picture in a complex situation.

In any event, it's time to start this crazy thing called life over - again! :-O

Ciao for now... =]

Changes

My path in life has yet again changed. I'll keep my friends posted, but my internet access might be spotty as these changes and my itinerary go.

Cheers, and talk soon.

'Fly

New Gear & Settling In

Hello, everyone. I'm still gradually settling into my new apartment and job. It's been quite a change with my move and job switch, but it's exciting and demanding, fun and arduous -- all at once. It'll take time for me to reach my normal comfort level, so to speak, but things are moving along and so far no major problems have occurred and some very good things have happened. I'm very grateful.

I bought some wonderful new photographic equipment today and I'm thrilled with it so far. I've only shot about 40 photos with it since it's dark outside now and it was later in the day when I actually bought it, and I'm still going through the user info., but it's (current) pro level equipment and I'm excited to start shooting photos with it ASAP. My last camera has become so outdated! I cannot believe the difference even between the point-and-click cameras of today and what I was using. I'd like to think that my prior shots were still good quality, but now I'll hopefully be able to take full advantage of the advances that have been made.

In any event, things are going well for me and I'm sorry for not updating very often here, but since the 1st of the year everything has been in a state of flux to a degree. New apartment, new job, new state I'm living in, having a roommate, etc.

Cheers for now, and here's a very bad test snapshot in my new apartment with my new camera - my cat says "hello!" lol

Moving/Offline

Hello, everyone. I'll be moving into a new place and will not have my internet access installed for approximately a week. It sucks, but this happens with utilities sometimes. They get backlogged and you have to wait, especially in a city of 4.5 million people. It's nuts.

In any event, I wanted to let you know I'll be back online as soon as I can. Those of you who have my mobile telephone number can reach me there still, but as of about 30 minutes from this post, I'm checking out of the hotel here and going to move into my new place.

I've been hired at one of the city's best-rated companies to work for, and I'm going to make better money than I'd expected, so that's good. I'm excited, a bit anxious, and everything's changing, so I have to "go with the flow" of things and keep on keeping on...

Cheers to all, and I hope this post finds everyone safe, happy, healthy, and continually enjoying the gift of life which we've all been given. =]

Talk to you soon!

'Fly

For Christina...

This made me cry tonight. My last girlfriend (both her parents were reverends) adored this song, and it was one of "our songs."

Christina, this is for you, sweetheart. I love you and I pray for you every day. You've done more for me than you'll ever know...

*Love's Divine*

"Then the rainstorm came, over me
And I felt my spirit break
I had lost all of my, belief you see
And realized my mistake
But time through a prayer, to me
And all around me became still

I need love, love's divine
Please forgive me now I see that I've been blind
Give me love, love is what I need to help me know my name

Through the rainstorm came sanctuary
And I felt my spirit fly
I had found all of my reality
I realize what it takes

'Cause I need love, love's divine
Please forgive me now I see that I've been blind
Give me love, love is what I need to help me know my name

Oh I, don't bet (don't bend), don't break (don't break)
Show me how to live and promise me you won't forsake
'Cause love can help me know my name

Well I try to say there's nothing wrong
But inside I felt me lying all along
But the message here was plain to see
Believe me

'Cause I need love, love's divine
Please forgive me now I see that I've been blind
Give me love, love is what I need to help me know my name

Oh I, don't bet (don't bend), don't break (don't break)
Show me how to live and promise me you won't forsake
'Cause love can help me know my name

Love can help me know my name."

(Copyright Seal/Warner Brothers/WEA 2003)

Trapped?

We live on a mountain,
Right at the top.

There's a beautiful view
From the top of the mountain.
Every morning, I walk towards the edge
And throw little things off...
Like: Car parts, bottles, and cutlery
Or whatever I find lying around.

It's become a habit,
A way to start the day.

I go through all this
Before you wake up
So I can feel happier
To be safe up here with you.

I go through all this
Before you wake up
So I can feel happier
To be safe up here with you.

It's early morning.
No one is awake.
I'm back at my cliff,
Still throwing things off.
I listen to the sounds they make
On their way down.
I follow with my eyes 'til they crash.

I imagine what my body would sound like
Slamming against those rocks...
And when it lands
Will my eyes be closed or open?

I go through all this
Before you wake up
So I can feel happier
To be safe up here with you.

I go through all this
Before you wake up
So I can feel happier
To be safe up here with you.

I go through all this
Before you wake up
So I can feel happier
To be safe up here with you.

Safe up, safe up (au fin)

Lyrics Copyright Bjork/Elektra/WEA 1995

Domestic violence not only emotonally imprisons people, but it can be deadly. If you or a friend feel like you're trapped in an abusive relationship, REACH OUT. People are willing to help and there's nothing wrong in asking for help. Love heals, doesn't injure, and only hurts when it ends, but sometimes the end of love is a new, healthy beginning because if it's not reciprocal, it's not really love... If you feel trapped, PLEASE seek counseling, call a friend, or you're more than welcome to e-mail me and I'll keep everything in confidence.

War on Terror?

The war on terror...

There is no terror in my heart.
Death is with us all.
We suck him down with our first breath,
And spit him out as we fall.
There is no terror in my heart,
No dread of the unknown.
Desire for paradise to be...
We love this on our own!
No, I don't want you anywhere near me
I don't want you anywhere near me
Get your fucking world out of my head
I don't want you anywhere near me
I don't want you anywhere near me
Get your fucking world out of my head
I don't want your "us or them"
No I don't need your "us or them"
Oh I don't want your "us or them"
I don't need your "us or them
Your us or them..."

I live in knowledge of real truth
And all my gods are great...
The doleful cant of a bigot,
Blinded by fear and hate...
You live in knowledge of real truth?
The biggest lie I heard...
How sick in your mind and your soul
To be scared of my voice and my words
Oh you don't want me anywhere near you
You don't want me anywhere near you
Get my fucking head out of your world!
You don't want me anywhere near you
You don't want me anywhere near you
Get my fucking head out of your world!
I don't want your "us or them!"
No I don't need your "us or them!"
Oh I don't want your "us or them!"
I don't need your "us or them!"
As the only way this ever ends is...

"me"

My Dearest...

My Dearest - Friends

Some of you are ill at the moment, sure to recover.
Some of you are sad, and you'll shortly (in the grand scheme of things) suffer.
Some of you struggle to live.
Some of you live to struggle.

It's of no import to me.

A friend is a friend. I stand by you.

I love my friends. They're my family. I feel as if I have virtually none anymore.

My friends, my heart is yours, my ear yours, my hands yours to aid you, my legs yours to supply you with that which you need.

Do not suffer. Do not worry. Do not be discouraged. As long as there is breath in my lungs and blood coursing through me, a true friend shall always have my aid, my heart, my love, my loyalty, and my passionate affection & trust.

Throughout life we all encounter obstacles, little or monumental, and we must sometimes rely upon others who care to get past those obstacles. I am PROUD and HONORED to help a TRUE friend through his or her challenges in life.

It's a pleasure and a privilege to help my friends, and I DO NOT take those things lightly.

My friends, do not be dismayed or beleagured; with love and friendship, there is nothing we cannot overcome. Nothing.

To my friends who are ill, get well, and get well soon, and keep your chins high and your spirits higher. To my friends battling the day-to-day survival situation, don't worry too much, but apply yourself 100% and show what you're made of. To my friends who are "living to struggle," you need a swift kick in the ass and a reality check - sorry, but it has to be said. There are millions of hungry people in the world who can't do SHIT about it, but the people I know aren't living 8,000 feet above sea level in Tanzania or wherever and starving. GET A JOB. Nothing is beneath you when your belly's empty and you're cold and dirty. I'll support you as long as you support yourself.

My friends are my family. Due to certain circumstances, I've become estranged from my pseudo-Patrician family. They/we have always claimed to be "down-to-earth" sorts of people, but as I've grown up, I see them all mutating into very ugly, unpleasant, judgmental people - that's not for me.

A person can enjoy and savor and know a fine wine, to be sure, but he or she can also enjoy a glass of grape juice. My family can no longer make that discernment, and in their eyes, I'm a raisin.

My FRIENDS, however, see the difference, and they somehow see me for WHO I am, not for some ridiculously-expected doctorate degree recipient, a million-dollar per-year job, and a guy with wife, a dog, and 2.3 kids (although that would be nice one day).

I just want to be me, and I just want my friends to be themselves, and in order to do that, we have to love and trust one another. Sometimes we get burned, lied to, and abused but, in the end, you can never love unless you can trust and be honest with both yourself and another...

That's both the beginning and the end, as I see it, both in friendships and in romance.

Cheers.

- Nightfly

A Day Goes By...

Where were you when I fell from grace
Frozen heart, an empty space
Something's changing, it's in your eyes
Please don't speak, you'll only lie
I found treasure not where I thought
Peace of mind can't be bought
Still I believe

I just hang on
Suffer well
Sometimes it's hard
It's hard to tell

An angel led me when I was blind
I said take me back, I've changed my mind
Now I believe
From the blackest room, I was torn
He called my name, a love was born
So I believe

I just hang on
Suffer well
Sometimes it's hard
It's hard to tell

I just hang on
Suffer well
Sometimes it's hard
So hard to tell

Love...

So we in sleep in beds we never made
Holding close to love, when love should fade
Holding on to this is the best thing we'll ever do

The morning sun is sweet and soft on your eyes
Oh my love, you always leave me surprised
I feel my heart start to burst
With all my love for you

And oh how it rains
And oh how it pours
I never could feel this way
For anyone but you

And oh how it rains
And oh how it pours
I never could feel this way
For anyone but you

So we take some time and slip away
Holding on to love, when love should stay
Holding on to you is the best thing I'll ever do

The evening sun is sweet and soft in your face
Oh I'll never, ever leave this place
I feel my heart start to burst
With all my love for you

And oh how it rains
And oh how it pours
I never could feel this way
For anyone but you

And oh how it rains
And oh how it pours
I never could feel this way
For anyone but you

- Moby

(я тебя люблю, Anastasiya =] )

Dis lui toi que je t'aime

Dis lui toi que je t'aime
Ou programme moi sur I.B.M.
Je n'aimerais pas le blesser
Je m'rends compte que pour compte nous l'avons laissé
Dis lui toi que je t'aime
Et que il se branche
Sur la F.M.
Alors il pourra me capter
Ou bien c'est qu'il est complètement disjoncté
Je ne peux pas les yeux
Dans les yeux
Balancer ça
Il ne me croirait pas
Je n'veux pas annoncer la couleur
Entre toi et moi
Je vois l'émoi
Quand il comprendra sa douleur
Je n'sais pas
Ce que tu dois
Faire pour être le seul double de moi
Dis lui toi que je t'aime
C'est toujours le même dilemme
Un jour ou toujours qui sait
Combien de mois d'émoi cela va durer
Dis lui toi que ja t'aime
Entre l'amour l'amour et la haine
Question de pleins et de déliés
Qui sait combien de temps cela va durer
Dis lui dis lui redis lui quand même
Dédie lui ce poème
C'est le never more jamais à tout jamais
Dis lui toi que je t'aime
Bien sûr on en revient au même
Thème insoluble c'est vrai
C'est toi que j'aime
C'est toi que j'aime
Pour de vrai...

-- Dédie à Karin - dans mon coeur toujours. Je t'aime, belle fille. Tu me manques.